Climate Change in Outer Space?

With some of this generation’s best problem solvers under one roof, there is only one challenge that cannot be solved: the extreme temperatures on the fifth floor of the Sheraton Hotel, home to the United Nations Office for Outer Space Affairs. Delegates in UNOOSA are hard at work trying to resolve the issue of debris in space by merging several of the existing working papers, but the constant change in temperature is throwing many delegates off. Delegates recount being “ice cold” one minute, and “actively sweating” the next. “The extreme temperatures have made it incredibly difficult to concentrate,” noted the delegation of South Korea. “The only safe-zone is underneath the air vent in the back of the room. Otherwise, it’s either Antarctica or the Sahara Desert: there is no in between.”

It wasn’t just the delegates that noticed the shifting climate, either. “In our Chair’s defense, she has really tried to help us with the temperature,” added the delegate representing South Korea. “ . . .we were even given power over our own thermostat, but none of our efforts are paying off.” A reporter from Al-Baghdadia, who had spent a while in this room doing research, validated the rumor. “From personal experience, I can confirm that the temperature has been fluctuating quite a bit.”

Hopefully the temperature will reach a resting point, and the delegates of UNOOSA can get back to the hard work they have been putting in all day – the future of outer space may depend on it.


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